Sammy is a cowboy, all who know him will avow,
Although he isn’t like your standard issue boy of cow.
While most cowpokes go giddy-up while perched upon a hor-us,
Cowboy Sammy bucks the trend on his faithful brontosaurus.
This dinosaur’s a true blue pal, whose name is Herschel Preeze,
He loves scratches under the chin and eats only Muenster cheese.
Most cowboys herd cows, which is how the term entered our lingo,
But Cowboy Sammy herds and breeds pink plastic lawn flamingo!
It may sound easy but flamingos can prove hard to tame,
You have to muss their feathers and beat them at card games.
Real cowboys carry six guns to draw quickly at high noon,
But Cowboy Sammy makes do with a harmless wooden spoon.
Said spoon stirs soups and chilies made with sweets like beans of jelly,
Which dance before your eyes and nestle snugly in your belly.
While other cowboys meet ‘round fires to sing and play mouth harp,
Sammy beats the bongos with sea life like bass and carp.
The mollusks shake maracas while the whale song’s amplified
And squid and sawfish pluck and bow the eight-string octopi!
No, Sammy doesn’t meet your standard cowboy definition,
But all are charmed by his unique Old West juxtapositions.
And even though some feel he’s as bona fide as canned spammy,
Most agree the paragon of cowboyhood is Sammy.